Random thoughts

I am feeling especially scatter-brained lately. Sometimes, I feel like my life is one, long, never-ending "to do" list. I have felt that way a lot in my life, but now, it takes me much, much longer to actually complete most tasks. For example, I know I probably owe lots of people thank-you notes for various gifts they have given or favors they have done. I probably need to let this go, but I feel this bit of guilt gnawing at me about not writing them. Starting when I was little, my grandmother always stressed the importance of sending thank-you notes to people. And, back then, and even more recently, it was fun to pick out the paper or note cards, find a nice pen to write with, and compose a thoughtful and sincere note of thanks. Somewhere along the way, though, it became more difficult to find the time to do them, and started to feel like a chore, which is totally wrong to say since it sounds like I don't appreciate the thing for which I should be giving thanks. Like I'm not grateful. And, then, I wonder, why not just do it now? Just sit down right now and write out those thank-you notes, instead of scribbling down random thoughts from my addled brain. If I knew the answer, I probably would have done them already.

Last night, I went out with friends. Ladies' night dinner. I wore my high-heeled boots from Italy! I carried a purse (not a diaper bag)! I wore mascara and, gasp, lip gloss! Granted, I was late, by, like an hour, and I didn't eat dinner, and the waiter thought I was weird when I asked if I could order a half of a beer, because I just can't drink a whole beer anymore, and I tried hard to keep up with the banter about Capitol Hill gossip that I used to be so accustomed to participating in, when really I was just waiting for the chance to whip out a photo of my adorable son to show these ladies, some of whom I haven't seen since I was pregnant over a year ago. But, the waiter obliged me with my half-beer -- Stella! -- and I did keep up with the political conversation and talk did wander toward babies and motherhood -- it helps that the woman who organized the dinner is pregnant with her first child -- and I did get to show off the cute photo of Jonah. And, even though it was kind of hard to get out of the house last night and I was really only gone less than two hours, I arrived home feeling a little bit refreshed, glad to have a few laughs not related to baby poop, a little bit more rounded out.

Now, about that to-do list...
~ Nicole