Happy Mother's Day

Today is the second time I am celebrating Mother's Day as a mother myself. It may be one of those holidays invented by advertisers or greeting card companies, but, frankly, I like it. And, though I'm still kind of waking up, before the day really starts rolling -- breakfast, play, lunch, nap, play, dinner, bath, books, bed -- I thought I'd share a few random, if a bit disjointed, thoughts on this beautiful, sunny Mother's Day morning.

I got to sleep in today, a little bit, but it was hard to stay in bed when I could hear Jonah chatting and playing happily, practicing some new words that we understand -- "pup" (cup), "tee-eey" (kitty), "cruck" (truck) -- and a few that sound really cute but we haven't quite figured out yet. (We think he is practicing "Hugo." Yay!) And, when I did get up, Jonah walked up to me and said, "Mama" and then gave me a big hug. Does he understand today is a special day? Maybe. Even Sammy, our cat, jumped into my lap this morning, something he rarely does.

Matthew is making a special breakfast today. I requested French toast. We are having whole wheat French toast topped with sliced bananas and real maple syrup. Yum, yum and yum. I love it when Matthew cooks for me. I especially love it when he also cooks for Jonah!

When I was a kid, my sister and I knew how to be royal pains in the asses at times. When Mother's Day or Father's Day rolled around, we would almost always ask, just to be brats, why isn't there a Kid's Day? Mom's answer: "Every day is Kid's Day." It's really true and I'm sure some day I will say the same thing, but right now I am still in awe of my sweet, beautiful, blond-haired little boy, who is less and less of a baby every day. Right now, he is looking at the coloring book that the clerk at the post office gave him, calling the cartoon pictures of beevers "tee-eey!" and scribbling a bit with the crayon here and there. I still wonder where the heck he came from while at the same time finding it hard to remember my life before he was here. Today is Mother's Day, but I know it will be all about Jonah, because really, isn't that what Mother's Day is all about? The kids. And, that's fine by me.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mother's in my life. Love, Nicole

Guest blog: A visit

Note from The Adventures of Jonah Cavanaugh: I would like to thank Jonah's Auntie Dani for contributing this special guest blog post. If you would like to contribute a special guest, please let us know!

Jonah has come to Western MA before, but this is the first time he has stayed with us. We spent a lot of time preparing, getting groceries and baby gates and toys for him to play with. It was great to have Jonah, and also Nicki and Matt, stay with us. So here are the top 10 things we did with Jonah during his visit to Garfield Street: - by Auntie Dani

1. Breakfast! I am not a morning person. At all. Somehow waking up to that smiley little boy was such a joy. He always looks so happy to see people and he loves sitting at the table eating with us and pointing back and forth from Uncle Marc to Auntie Dani, to Daddy’s nose, to Mama’s nose. It was like I needed one less cup of coffee. He made it difficult to leave for work.

2. Playin’ with Ted – We have 2 cats, but only one of them was interested in being anywhere near Jonah. Elaine watched suspiciously from afar. But it is so cute to see how interested Ted the cat was in Jonah the toddler. And Jonah sure loves animals. He took apart the Alpine Scratcher Cat Toy and sat in the box part, insisting on being pushed around as if it was a sled. Ted watched and was never very far from Jonah.

3. Bedtime - There are a couple of reasons I place this on the top 10. There is something soothing about quieting the house down every night by 7:30 and making it dim and calm, making sure the dishes are done and settling in for visiting or reading or TV upstairs. Marc and I don’t always do that.
The other was hanging out with Nic and Matt. Whenever they came to visit and stayed at Pepe’s, Marc and I usually left after Jonah went to bed. We really miss out grown up time together with my sister and Matt. Marc and Matt are almost like brothers, and the 4 of us have had some really great times as adults over the last 7 (!) years.

4. Fisher Price Barn Yard- I’d been wanting to play with this thing since I brought it home a week before the visitors arrived. I borrowed it from a friend at work and I knew it was going to be awesome. It was. It still is. I haven’t given it back yet….

5. Secret Disc Party - Nicki actually went out with the high school girls one night and I got to baby-sit for Matthew and Marc while Jonah slept soundly downstairs. We played the ol’ secret disc party game - a Cavanaugh tradition, I am told – and drank some Berkshire Brewing Company Beer. Here is a sample of what we played: Johnny Polanski, Permanent Disorder, Velvet Crush, House of Pain, REM, Pete Drouge, Devo, Stone Temple Pilots, Liz Phair, Lemonheads, Ice Cube, U2, Zappa, Strokes, and Urge Overkill.

6. Energy Park – We walked to the Energy Park downtown several times. They have some really cool trains, one is a wooden play structure and one is an actual caboose. Of course, Jonah wanted to play on the real train. So I cautiously brought him aboard. He put his hands on the big wheel and tried to turn it with all his might. He also pointed out a miniature train over the sign to the park, something I had never seen before. I now think of him when I see the sign.

7. Jonah’s Cousin Hugo’s birthday - We don’t have any kids, so it should come as no surprise that going to another 1-yr old birthday party is not on the top of our Saturday to do list. But we had a great time. Marc took the day off from work and all the extended friend-family people, who we don’t see a lot, were there. Eliza and Gerard were such great hosts. The house was packed and the cake was delicious. Who could ask for more?

8. Cooking - I like to cook, and Marc and I do make a dinner plan every night, which I think was one of the appeals to staying with us. I am used to whipping things up for 2-4 people, saving leftovers and using some the next day. Cooking for 5 people, including one hungry little toddler was something else. I kept thinking how fun it was to use the WHOLE box of pasta and to buy THREE packages of chicken thighs and I really enjoyed using my big pots and pans. Jonah eats everything and he eats a lot and he eats often. It is so cute. Making these large meals reminded me of the holidays when we sometimes have 10 or 12 people for dinner. Only it was better weather.

9. Seeing baby cows – the five of us and Pepe went to Davenport Maple Farm to take in the last weekend of maple sugar season. After breakfast we headed over to the area where they keep the cows. There were two little baby cows that Jonah wasn’t too afraid to be near, as long as he held tight to Mama’s neck with one hand. Jonah also enjoyed seeing the big vat of maple sugar, the big truck and junk parked near the building, and looking out over the huge open field.

10. Seeing our best friends! I think I speak for both Marc and myself when I say that Nicki and Matt and Jonah are out very best fiends in the whole world. We look forward to seeing what the future has in for Jonah as he grows, and at family holidays, on trips, and hopefully lots of regular days with our extended family.

There is a saying that Nicki and I exchange when we want to express everything one could possibly want to express to your dearest only sister who is far away. At the end of the email or letter or card we write “Keep…”, so…

-Keep

Lightening up

Matthew just left for a work trip to Mexico, Trinidad and Tobago, so I will be taking care of Jonah by myself until Sunday night. It's been a while since I've done this. The last time was really, really hard, even though I went home to visit my family for the duration of Matthew's trip. But, Jonah was smaller then. And, some things have changed. But, I also learned many lessons from times past. So, I have decided that I'm going to try to make the best of it this time around, and I am giving myself permission to do a few things to help lighten my load.

I'm going to try to look at this time as a chance to really spend some time with Jonah. I know that might sound silly since I spend every single day with him and have since he was born. But, we just got back from a trip with the family, and while Jonah LOVED it and had probably the best time of his young life, he and I may have gotten just a touch (just at teeny bit) out of sync. Nothing too bad, really, but thinking of this time alone with him as a way to get back in tune with each other will help me get through the next few nights (and exhausting days) and, I think, will help Jonah as he deals with all the frustrations that go along with being almost 16 months old, with being so small but having such very big desires and ambitions.

This time, too, I am planning to have a little bit of help. I've set up a few hours of babysitting over the weekend. A couple of mom friends have agreed to take Jonah for a few hours on Saturday and/or Sunday while I take a break, nap, clean, shower, exercise or do whatever it is I need to do, and I will return the favor for them later. Another friend has offered to help out here and there and I will take him up on that with the hope that he will play with Jonah one or two evenings while I prepare dinner and then clean up afterward. A few other friends know I will be alone and have offered to help or just spend some time with us, which is always great because it helps dilute the intensity of being alone with a toddler all day long.

The other thing we have going for us is that it is supposed to be absolutely beautiful and warm this weekend. That is good because yesterday and today are pretty gray, rainy and dreary. But, some lovely spring weather is bound to put smiles on our faces.

And, for the days when it's not so nice out, I have wheels. I made sure that I could keep the car -- Matthew arranged for a car service to bring him to and from Andrews Air Force Base, where he will catch the press charter plane. This will make it so much easier to bring Jonah places and get us both out of the house, regardless of the weather.

Catching some zzzz's will be a top priority, too. I'm going to try as hard as I can to go to bed super, super early, like as soon as I can after Jonah does. It's kind of fun to do this sometimes, and easier to do when I am home alone. I can put Jonah to bed, clean up a bit and then curl up in bed with a book and a cup of tea. It makes me really happy just thinking about it. And, getting even an hour extra will help a lot since Jonah almost always wakes up between 4 and 5 a.m., not rested enough to start the day but usually has a hard time going back to sleep. Since we nightweaned Jonah, I have tried not to nurse him any earlier than 6 a.m., so Matthew has been handling these really early wakings. Most of the time, Matthew is able to coax Jonah back to sleep. And, I'm a bit out of practice. But, I plan to cut myself some slack. I will try to encourage Jonah to go back to sleep without nursing, but if it doesn't work out, I'm giving myself permission to take him to bed with me for the rest of the morning. Part of me feels a little bad because this will likely make things a little more difficult for Matthew upon his return, but I will not do well if I have to wake up every day at 4 a.m. On the other hand, maybe Jonah will sleep even better over the next few days! I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

I'm curious to see how Jonah will handle his dad's absence. He is bound to really notice it now, and I hope that he will handle it OK. I plan to talk to him about it, and maybe we can do some webchats with Matthew, but Jonah is lucky to have a dad who, despite having kind of random and unpredictable hours, spends a great deal of time with him. I know Jonah will miss him. And, clearly, Matthew is already missing Jonah.

I know I am capable of surviving the next few days, and this time I am going to try to make it easier on myself. Now ... if I could just find a way to sneak in a yoga class ... Hmmm. ~ Nicole

p.s. Here is a photo of Jonah after he fell asleep in my lap on the couch last weekend, right before we had planned to put him in the car for his nap during our errands. After he fell asleep, I realized I still had to change his diaper. This photo was taken after the diaper change. We were amazed he slept through it all! How things have changed!