I'm home

I'm the luckiest girl in the world.

I went out to dinner with my good friend, Jessica, tonight. I drank a little beer. We caught up on our lives. I stayed out late, for me. It was quite a lovely, fun night.

But, I have to say that the best part was coming home. The boys are both asleep (for now). The house is quiet. The kitties are curled up together on their bed. I imagine Jonah snoozing away in his crib where I left him earlier this evening, smelling fresh and clean from his bath. Matthew is slumbering, too; he's been working hard at daddy-hood lately.

I sure do like to complain sometimes when things aren't feeling right or there's too much to do or this or that has to be done right now. But, man, tonight, I just have to wonder, how in the world did I get so lucky?

I have changed into my pajamas, brushed my teeth, and the house is warm and cozy. I will tiptoe down the hall past Jonah's room and slip into the soft flannel sheets next to my husband. It was fun to go out tonight. I walked alone. Who would know that I was a mother, a wife? But, now that I am home with my family, I can think of no where I would rather be. ~ Nicole

Random thoughts

I am feeling especially scatter-brained lately. Sometimes, I feel like my life is one, long, never-ending "to do" list. I have felt that way a lot in my life, but now, it takes me much, much longer to actually complete most tasks. For example, I know I probably owe lots of people thank-you notes for various gifts they have given or favors they have done. I probably need to let this go, but I feel this bit of guilt gnawing at me about not writing them. Starting when I was little, my grandmother always stressed the importance of sending thank-you notes to people. And, back then, and even more recently, it was fun to pick out the paper or note cards, find a nice pen to write with, and compose a thoughtful and sincere note of thanks. Somewhere along the way, though, it became more difficult to find the time to do them, and started to feel like a chore, which is totally wrong to say since it sounds like I don't appreciate the thing for which I should be giving thanks. Like I'm not grateful. And, then, I wonder, why not just do it now? Just sit down right now and write out those thank-you notes, instead of scribbling down random thoughts from my addled brain. If I knew the answer, I probably would have done them already.

Last night, I went out with friends. Ladies' night dinner. I wore my high-heeled boots from Italy! I carried a purse (not a diaper bag)! I wore mascara and, gasp, lip gloss! Granted, I was late, by, like an hour, and I didn't eat dinner, and the waiter thought I was weird when I asked if I could order a half of a beer, because I just can't drink a whole beer anymore, and I tried hard to keep up with the banter about Capitol Hill gossip that I used to be so accustomed to participating in, when really I was just waiting for the chance to whip out a photo of my adorable son to show these ladies, some of whom I haven't seen since I was pregnant over a year ago. But, the waiter obliged me with my half-beer -- Stella! -- and I did keep up with the political conversation and talk did wander toward babies and motherhood -- it helps that the woman who organized the dinner is pregnant with her first child -- and I did get to show off the cute photo of Jonah. And, even though it was kind of hard to get out of the house last night and I was really only gone less than two hours, I arrived home feeling a little bit refreshed, glad to have a few laughs not related to baby poop, a little bit more rounded out.

Now, about that to-do list...
~ Nicole

My First Thanksgiving

By Jonah Thomas Cavanaugh

I knew this wasn't going to be a typical Thursday. Auntie Eliza, Uncle Gerard and Cousin Hugo were visiting us. I think they live very far away, but when they arrived, it seemed like no time had passed since I'd last seen them, except that Hugo is bigger, sitting up. I mean, he's still a baby compared to me, since I can stand up and have taken a couple of steps all by myself. But, he's still fun to hang out with. Hugo and I were very busy, as usual, pushing board books around the living room floor and chewing on blocks. Obviously, as babies, we still had a lot to do, even though it was Thanksgiving! Like looking out the window pointing to birdies, sharing my sippy cup and inspecting almost every piece of Tupperware, sucking on them and spreading them around the house. But, Mama and Daddy and Auntie E and Uncle G just sat around most of the day staring at us with these goofy looks on their faces, smiling a lot and laughing. I think they were cooking some big dinner, but mostly they just looked at us or hugged us. All morning I kept pointing at my turkey card from Auntie Dani, asking to play with it. I was dying to chew on it and slide it around the floor and tear it up. FINALLY, mama let me have it. Then, we went for a little walk in the strollers. I showed Hugo around my neighborhood and he was really happy when the supermarket cashier said nice things to him. I knew he would be! My friend, Ken, stopped by with his friend, Robin. Ken's cool. We hang out sometimes when Mama and Daddy go do stuff. As usual, Ken took a lot of pictures of me and Hugo. He's always doing that. After that, I had some lunch. Mama kept talking about the turkey that I was eating for the first time ever, but I just kept shoveling things in my mouth like I always do. Then, I got very, very sleepy. Apparently, Hugo was sleepy, too, because I think he was already napping. After a nice, long nap, I woke up and Dad came and got me. I hugged him and snuggled with him, but soon, I was ready to resume my work and show Hugo how to read books and stuff. I'm not sure if he minded when I got so excited and started patting and hitting him. I just couldn't help myself. He's so cute and nice. I just wanted to put my hands on his face and in his mouth. Who wouldn't? While we were playing on the floor, all the grownups ate a lot of pie and ice cream. I mean, they ate A LOT! No wonder they started getting tired for bedtime even before Hugo and I did! Pretty soon, Hugo had to go because it was his bedtime, and I knew that meant my bedtime was coming soon. I listened to some lullabies and read some books with Mama and Daddy. Daddy gave me a bath. Man, I LOVE taking a bath! It's so fun to splash around in the water. SO fun! After that, I got very, very tired and wished Dad would hurry up putting on my pajamas so we could read The Bear Snores On, my current favorite bedtime read. Then, Mama came in and snuggled me into her arms and I nursed and felt warm and safe and cozy and sleepy. I would say it was a pretty darn good Thanksgiving. I hope they are all this fun!